If you are not familiar with the Adria Richards situation and what happened at PyCon 2013, just Google it, there is a wide range of info some good, some bad, some just hateful.
The basic happenings seem to be that Ms. Richards was at a professional conference and spoke with some men behind her about things related to the conference, then as the speaker came on stage and she turned around to listen to what she was there for, the men behind her began to make lewd jokes. She reported them to the people running the conference using a very public forum of Twitter, and included their photos. The conference staff spoke to the men, they apologized and everyone went about their business for the rest of the conference. Then one of the men was fired from his job and he got on a public forum and blamed Ms. Richards for his firing. Both men worked for the same company, the other man apparently still has a job. The internet blew up, attacked Ms. Richards' employer and sent her death and rape threats and her company responded by firing her.
Ms. Richards' situation is really just the seed of what has gotten my attention though. What has gotten me most intrigued as been so many people saying that Ms. Richards didn't have a right to be offended by off color jokes in a professional setting. That this all somehow justifies her getting rape and death threats. And everyone keeps derailing this to could she have done a better, more professional job of reporting the incident. She probably could have, but at what cost? Did she deserve to miss part of the conference because 2 guys were misbehaving? That wasn't her fault, she shouldn't have to take time out of her day to hunt down staff to make them behave. But some seem to think we live in an idealized safe world and she should have confronted them directly. Well considering the response she has gotten, it does seem there was a risk of similar if she had tried the direct approach too. That would be seem not safe. But ultimately not the real point.
I do wonder what we mean when we say we are offended by sexual jokes in class and work environments. I know I am bothered by them a great deal. But to be honest you are not soiling my delicate Southern ears with dirty words. I grew up on dirty jokes. My grandmother made naughty gift items and could sculpt a penis out of pantyhose so realistically that you could determine if it was circumcised or not. I hope to grow up to be Nanny Ogg. There has been more than one sausage joke in my past. But not at work. Nor in places where I don't know the men around me.
The question becomes "Why?". I am obviously not some delicate little flower that can't bear to hear a naughty joke, but when that joke is in an inappropriate time and place, anxiety spikes just a bit. I am cautious around the person that acted inappropriately, and I am wary of working alone with him. There is suddenly a red flag there. It will affect work. The question becomes "if he is willing to act inappropriately in a sexual manner here and now, when and where will he next time and will this behavior escalate?" And with our current culture the next question becomes "if it does escalate, how can I prevent being blamed for it".
Yes that is right. When things go bad society isn't asking "Does he have a pattern of inappropriate sexual behavior?" They are asking "Does she have a pattern of tolerating or encouraging inappropriate sexual behavior?"
But this is a two edged sword. If she does speak out against this inappropriate sexual behavior she is branded as "not being able to take a joke" or "a trouble maker" or "violating a man's right to free speech".
If it is made known that a woman reported an incident that made her uncomfortable, men then seem to feel free to threaten her with actual rape or even death - as we have seen in the Adria Richards situation. She can loose her job, because somehow "she" created a hostile work environment or the threats against her make it impossible for her to continue to do her job.
